In a recent BNI Education Slot, Sauren Ghosh delivered a thought-provoking challenge to members: are we truly living out the principle of Givers Gain, or are we unintentionally slipping into a pattern of just taking?

https://youtu.be/83iQGZfTo-g

BNI is designed around the idea of mutual benefit, but Sauren pointed out that many members stop short after receiving a referral. They say thank you, give an update, maybe even deliver a testimonial – but don’t always take the next step of finding a way to help the person who helped them.

He stressed that while it’s not always possible to give directly back to the same member, it is possible – and essential – to support others in the room. That’s where the strength of the network lies.

Sauren also introduced a practical habit: dedicating just 15 minutes each week to focus on generating referrals. Protecting this time ensures that members keep their “BNI radar” switched on and consistently contribute to the group. As he reminded everyone, “specific is terrific” – the clearer we are about our asks, the easier it is for others to help us.

The message was clear: giving more not only strengthens relationships and makes others feel valued, but it also results in receiving more over time. By becoming a maker, not just a taker, of referrals, members can unlock greater success in their BNI journey.

Sauren closed with a simple call to action: “Let’s give more.”

Full Transcript:

0:00
I believe it’s our duty to help the person that helps you. Even though we talk about Givers Gain.

0:08
[Music]

0:17
So Givers Gain – it’s a lie. Takers take more, isn’t it? Don’t you think?

0:24
Well, hang on a minute. We’re challenging one of BNI’s core values here: Givers Gain. But let’s have a look at what it looks like in reality.

0:33
Joe’s already mentioned it. Why do we join BNI?

0:36
Business.

0:37
Get more business, get more money. So, what happens is we get our first referral. Perhaps you thank that person for giving you the referral straight away. Perhaps you get the business. Then you thank that person again: “Thank you, I got the business.” You update the app if you’re doing things the right way. And you deliver a testimonial.

0:59
But do you at any point during that process look for a referral for the person that gave the referral to you? I believe it’s our duty to help the person that helps you. Even though we talk about Givers Gain, we should help that person back as soon as we can.

1:16
Now, do I always manage to do this? No, of course I don’t. And we know through BNI training that if someone gives you a referral, you might not be able to give them one back straight away, but you could give a referral to somebody else in the room.

1:31
It’s not always the most obvious choice, of course. Like many in the room, I’ve got the maximum points for giving referrals, but I know from the stats that we’ve all got access to, not everyone who’s got maximum points is getting back what they deserve from the rest of us in this room.

1:49
So, we’re going to have a slightly different thinking point. It’s all about getting our fair share back as well.

1:53
So, are takers just taking? It’s a great question, isn’t it? Probably thinking, “Am I just doing the taking, or am I giving? So how can you give better?”

2:05
What I found on my BNI journey: if you have a focused 15 minutes a week – doesn’t have to be a day – then you can spend time going through the notes that you’ve written down today, because I know you all make notes and take them away, and look at them again for those specific asks.

2:22
So, from you wanting to receive referrals, you have to be specific as well. You’ve got to help the person in the room to be able to help you as quickly as possible. We hear through BNI time and time again that “specific is terrific” because we know it works and it helps focus the mind on people looking for referrals for you as soon as they leave the meeting.

2:45
So how will other members feel if you are giving them more? They’re going to feel great, aren’t they? Because you’re trying to help them.

2:54
The additional side to it, the additional positive side, is you’re going to get back even more if you give. So, if you’re getting now and taking, and not giving as much as maybe you could or should, you’re going to get back even more if you give more.

3:08
I mean, that’s crazy, isn’t it? You might be getting what you’re getting at the moment, but you’re going to get back even more. Whether it’s 20, 100, 200, 2,000,000.

3:19
So, I want to encourage you not to just be a taker, but be a maker of referrals.

3:26
Yes, improving your giving will increase what you get back from BNI. So if you think it’s not working at the moment, just try giving a little bit more. Allocate that focused 15 minutes. That’s worked in my business and other areas of it. Focus 15 minutes and protect that time.

3:42
If someone wants an appointment at that time and you allocate, I don’t know, 9:45 to 10 a.m. on a Friday morning or a Monday morning to generate the referrals for the following week, then that is certainly going to work for you.

3:56
But generate one referral – why stop there? We’ve got people in the room who are consistently giving two, three, four, five referrals. Their little BNI radar is on all the way through to the next meeting.

4:07
Help the team and the team will benefit even more.

4:10
My name is Sauren Ghosh. Thanks for listening. Let’s give more.

4:15
[Music]