Public speaking regularly appears at the top of the list when people are asked about their greatest fears. For many, it ranks even higher than death. But for BNI members like Ray Jones and Nathan Dean, it’s a skill that can be learned, practised, and ultimately mastered.
In a recent Education Slot for BNI, both speakers shared honest and practical advice about how they’ve grown into more confident presenters.
Ray began with a candid story about his early experience in BNI. His first presentation left him staring at the screen with his back to the room, desperate to escape. But over time, inspired by members like Gail, Kieran, and Darren, he began to improve.
His turning point came through consistent effort: filming himself daily for one minute, joining Toastmasters in Chester, and watching speakers like Vinh Giang online. The results weren’t just confidence — they were professional. His speaking skills helped him grow his business too.
Nathan Dean picked up where Ray left off, addressing the universal fear of public speaking. He explained that while fear can’t be fully eliminated, it can be managed. His three top tips included reframing nerves as excitement, taking time to properly prepare, and focusing on the message instead of the performance.
Nathan, who regularly speaks in court, admitted he finds that easier than informal speaking — because in court, he’s focused on his message. That shift in mindset made a big difference.
The talk ended with a simple but powerful reminder: your audience wants your message. They aren’t criticising your delivery — they’re listening for value.
For any BNI member, this Education Slot offers both inspiration and clear, actionable advice. Whether you’re new to the group or looking to fine-tune your 10-minute slot, Ray and Nathan’s guidance will help you improve every time you speak.
Full Transcript:
(00:00) As opposed to giving the eulogy, I would probably rather be the one in the coffin. Morning everybody. My journey in public speaking with BNI started kind of shakily almost four years ago. I was a nervous wreck when I first did my presentation. I remember all those years ago I was like this, kind of looking at my presentation screen, my back to my audience.
(00:30) I was totally scared, totally out of it. I’m thinking, just get me the hell out of here. Anyway, these days, I’ve progressed in so many different ways. You wouldn’t believe it. I’ve been inspired by long-term members like Gail, like Kieran, like Darren. As Darren was saying before, none of us were meant to be public speakers, but we learn it by doing it every week, every month, and every year.
(00:57) So, I’ll just let you into a few secrets that I’ve learned on the way. Every morning I film myself for a minute on camera talking about a spontaneous subject, and that works every day for me. Also, I’m a good member of Toastmasters, which I attend in Chester two times a month. That really helps me in my journey.
(01:19) And also, I follow a guy called Vinh Giang on TikTok who Karen introduced me to a while back, and he’s an amazing public speaker. So, I highly recommend if you’re struggling with your public speaking to check him out. And yes, ever since, I’ve been pushing myself in my public speaking journey.
(01:43) I’m so busy in work. So, it’s helped me get more work. And yeah, it’s just a case of saying thank you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity every week to stand up and say my piece. And thank you. And now over to Nathan.
(02:00) Thanks very much, Ray. Yeah, similar to Ray, when I was looking into this and what to say today, I came across numerous pieces of research or studies which said people’s number one fear is public speaking. And it ranked higher than death as their fear. And when I thought about that, I thought…
(02:15) Given the opportunity at a funeral, as opposed to giving the eulogy, I would probably rather be the one in the coffin. So, when we’re looking at public speaking, it’s only human nature. We can only do things to reduce the fear of it. We can’t eradicate it completely. So, I just want to share my three top tips today as to what I’ve been doing and how it’s helped me.
(02:38) So, number one is to reframe how I think about it. Instead of being fearful, I try to think that I’m energized about it. I’m excited to share a piece of knowledge — maybe a legal update or anything around that. So, I’m excited to share that with people.
(02:57) Number two, and it’s probably ground-level stuff, but it bears saying again: preparation is key. You’ve probably all heard of the five Ps — proper preparation prevents poor performance. It’s simple, but just spending 30 minutes to an hour preparing what you want to say makes everything feel more natural when you go up and speak.
(03:14) And the third one — probably the most important one for me and what I’d ask anyone to take away if you listen to nothing else — is what’s helped me the most: focusing on the message. I stand up and speak in court regularly and I find that easier than doing something like this today.
(03:29) And I realise that’s because I’m focused on the message — the points, the arguments I’m making — rather than how I present it. I think your audience wants to hear what you have to say. It wants the key takeaways. It’s not being critical of how you say every word. It’s about what you’re saying and why.
(03:44) So those are the small steps I’ve taken. Hopefully I’ll continue to improve and eventually it’ll feel much more natural, rather than a terrifying experience. That’s it. Wonderful. Cheers. Thank you.
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